The Daily Mail Class Calculator

The BBC has recently claimed there are now seven social classes. Like all things from the BBC, they are wrong. Here to put it right is the Daily Mail with our British Class Calculator.

  1. Financial

    Have you ever needed handouts?

    • I've had to claim benefits.
    • I don't need those, thank you very much.
    • Only from Mummy and Daddy, but that doesn't count, right?
    • No, in tough times I sell my homegrown herbs.

  2. Financial

    Owning a home and looking at house prices is fascinating. Where do you own your home?

    • I don't own a home.
    • In England.
    • In one of the "other countries".
    • Do you just want the first home, or both?

  3. Social

    You're having a dinner party. Who would you invite?

    • Kate Middleton
    • The Queen
    • If only Diana was here
    • David Cameron (He's just popping round after we've gone riding)
    • Frankie Boyle or one of those so-called comedians of the day
    • An immigrant The new couple who moved in to the street

  4. Cultural activities

    What would you do on a normal day?

    • Go for a cancer checkup (You never know, these days)
    • Watch TV
    • Tut at things
    • Check my horoscope - first thing every morning
    • Think of the children
    • Write letters to the Daily Telegraph about the decline of this great nation
By @JonathanEx - see more silly things on JonathanCresswell.co.uk